Sweet Things on Sunday

Sometimes when I’m having a really rough day, I’ll text Ryan about it. And nine times out of ten, he responds with this image of a hedgehog.

Usually that really helps. Somehow, a happy lil hedgehog helps me to at least get a bit of the grip I need to pull myself out of a funk. But sometimes that doesn’t happen. And that’s when we pull in the big guns. That’s right: unusual animal best friendships. Here are five of my favorite for you to bookmark for when you’re having a crummy day.

Continue reading “Sweet Things on Sunday”

Listing our Healthy Coping Tools

*Content warning: discussion of anxiety, panic, and how Seasonal Affective Disorder can present itself in my life.
**This post may contain affiliate links.

So, lately, I’ve become more and more aware of the end of summer. Today in the town where I live, school is back in session. That means that the grocery store will get really busy at around 3:30 again and soon I’ll have to slow down through some of the best routes around town. Maybe it means that I’ll be able to get coffee with some of my mom friends more often?

It also means the end of summer.

And, look, summer isn’t my favorite season by any means. I’m not the kind of kid who deals well with heat at all—though I’m dealing with it better in the past few years. But soon the sun will start going down at around 4:00 pm and I’m not ready for it.

I have Seasonal Affective Disorder and winters can be so hard on me that even in August, I’m starting to stress out about knowing that the darkness is coming and there’s really not much we can do to stop it.

Last week Ryan came in the house and I was stuck on the couch. I wanted to get up and go outside but my limbs wouldn’t work for me. I was lying there holding a pillow in front of my face to hide that I was crying.

The panic kind of sweeps in out of nowhere like that. One minute it’s a sunny August day and your dog wants you to take her outside and the next minute, you’re pinned to the sofa and all I could verbalize to Ryan was, “It’s. Getting. Bad. It’s. Getting. Bad.” He sits by me and rubs my back until I yank away from him because he’s making me hot but I don’t have the words to explain—so then there’s another thing that gets added on. Sure, we’re already drowning in panic out of the blue let’s take on a bunch of guilt too, why not.

Ryan’s amazing when I’m in a space like that. He gets this really calm voice and tells me true things. He exaggerates his breathing to encourage me to match him. This particular time, it didn’t get so bad. I wasn’t completely swallowed and I felt really good about it. I’ve worked for years on dealing with panic attacks and sometimes it feels like you’re not getting anywhere. But those times when it doesn’t ruin your entire day is such a massive victory and it deserves to be celebrated. Any time you live through a panic attack, though, to be honest, it deserves to be celebrated.

After I calmed down, I explained to him about my worry. That I’ll get depressed when the sun starts to go down and I’m scared of it. I’m scared that this year it’ll get really, really bad because I don’t know if I have enough energy to fight it off this year.

We decided to not waste a summer night. So we went for a drive to Coronado Heights. I took a lot of photographs.

He’s so beautiful.

He had a birthday on Sunday, you know? He’s worth celebrating.

IMG_5488IMG_5501IMG_5491IMG_5490IMG_5503

I was reminded, today, of the importance of not only having a list of healthy coping tools handy but also keeping a schedule. I have the best friends who remind me of what I need and remind me to remember what has helped in the past.

What has helped me in the past (items in bold are usually reliable quick fixes, the others are more long-term solutions):
Riding my stationary bike often.
Painting regularly.
Cooking and eating meals that do good things to my body.
Watching game shows on television.
Taking a shower.
Wearing clothes that feel good on my body.
Cooking meals that we only get to eat when it’s cold outside.
Meditating.
Visiting with friends and checking in.

New things that I want to try:
Getting a “happy lamp”.
Taking a Vitamin D3 supplement.
Keeping the house cleaner than usual.
Learn about Hygge and lean more on that vibe.

Another thing that I want to remember is that it’s okay to not be okay and trying to fit a square peg into a round hole only makes things worse.

Please, I would love it if you’d share your list of coping mechanisms or other things you use to get through the hardest seasons for you. I’m going to keep a list in my planner, next to my bed, and in my phone. I never want to be without it. Let’s help hold one another up as the days get shorter.

XOXO, Lib

Sweet Things on Sunday

One of my greatest joys is planning vacations that we’ll probably never go on. I don’t know why–it’s just my favorite.

Today is Ryan’s birthday and in honor of that, I’m going to do a roundup of gorgeous, world-wide Airbnb’s to add to our bucket list. Ryan loves a rainforest so let’s stick to that.
If you’ve never used Airbnb before, here’s my referral link! When you use it, you’ll get $40 off your first booking and I’ll get some money, too! Yeah, forty whole dollars!

Continue reading “Sweet Things on Sunday”

How I Stayed Body Positive While on a Restrictive Diet

CW: Diet discussion as it relates to diagnosing health conditions. A little mention of disordered eating without description. Talk of the ways I’ve learned that certain foods affect my body. 

I’ve heard a lot of people in the fat activism community talking about the struggle between wanting to find out how different foods are affecting their bodies and not wanting to fall back into a diet/ weight loss hole that we’ve worked so hard to get out of. This is something that I’d been wondering about, too.

So let me fill you in on my experience. Please understand that this is not advice or anything like this, it’s just a telling of what this experience was like from my perspective.

Continue reading “How I Stayed Body Positive While on a Restrictive Diet”

Sweet Things on Sunday

August is for peaches. Specifically Colorado peaches that are shipped across our border in the back of an enormous truck that sets up in the parking lot of La Fiesta in McPherson Kansas. You can buy an entire case if you want to. You want to.

Peaches are my most favorite food. When people ask me what I would like my last meal to be, here is my answer:
Four slices of toast: one on homemade bread with salty butter, one on whole grain bread with cherry preserves, one on sourdough with smashed avocado and lots of good salt, and one on wonder bread with mayonnaise and home-grown tomatoes. And for dessert, a Colorado peach in August with homemade whipped cream.


Here are a list of things that I want to do to peaches in August but probably won’t because, instead, I’ll just stand outside and eat them fresh from my grubby little hands because nothing’s better than that.

This Peach Galette with Baklava Filling from A Cozy Kitchen.

This Spicy Ginger Miso Slaw with Peaches from Love and Lemons (I really do intend to make this one).

This Peach Ricotta Layer Cake from Half-Baked Harvest. Will I make a layer cake? Absolutely not. Do I desperately want to taste this? Uh huh. I love adding ricotta to baked goods.

That’s just a few sweet things on this Sunday.

XOXO, Lib

Photo by Charles Deluvio 🇵🇭🇨🇦 on Unsplash