Auden says that for the adult reader there are five ways you can evaluate a book, “I can see this is good and I like it; I can see this is good but I don’t like it; I can see this is good, and, though at present I don’t like it, I believe with perseverance I shall come to like it; I can see that this is trash but I like it; I can see that this is trash and I don’t like it.”
Continue reading “Amanda Wakes Up + September Book Club Selection”
Back in May, I introduced you to this new series I’m excited about called, “The Growing Season”. In that post, I introduced you to the Pounds family who own and operate Simple Abundance Farms in Hutchinson, Kansas. We’re following them through the summer to get a taste of what the season is like for them. Come along for part two of this adventure! Let’s check back in with Adam, Maggie, and Arlo to see what’s going on at Simple Abundance.
Continue reading “The Growing Season: Simple Abundance Farm Part II”
I started out my summer with goals that I wanted to reach. And to be fair, I really did reach a lot of those goals–you can check out the progress, here. They were very practical and easy to cross off of a list. Did I meet Fiona from the Cincinnati Zoo? No, did I go to the Cincinnati Zoo? I sure did. I met her parents–that counts.
But regardless of what was on my bucket list, this summer has been… full. My summer didn’t care about my expectations. My summer said, “that’s cute–let’s dedicate the next few months to a complete shift in your whole identity, doesn’t that sound fun?” I’m being stretched and pulled in a lot of completely unexpected ways. In ways that I still don’t have words for. I think that’s why I re-started reading and writing poetry this summer–because there’s just not a way to say it without metaphors, and broken up half-thoughts. There’s no way to really describe this beauty and the pain and the confusion and the absolute knowing–the &/Both-ness of life, as it were. I’m holding complete certainty in one hand and a whole dose of “what the fuck” in the other hand and I’m standing out on a ledge like I chased the Roadrunner and I also feel completely held. All at the same time. I’m sorry this isn’t making sense but hey–I don’t wrap up neatly. I’m a dynamic creature.
I keep picturing myself as a house and I feel like I happened upon a secret room that, despite living in this house for nearly 34 years, I had never noticed before. One day I’ll tell you about whats inside of this room. Even though everything in my life is for everyone–some things are mine, first. There is a season.
Last night we (the creators of &/Both Magazine) had a photo shoot. I’d kind of been dreading it because I’ve been wrestling with, like I said, identity issues. The idea of taking these photos–specifically to be used as an introduction at this exact moment in my life when I’m feeling not uncomfortably unsettled but unsettled nonetheless was sort of stressing me out.
But like anything I do, I give you who I am right now. Who I am, today. I am in a constant state of transition from one person to another to another to another.
And also, as you can see, that photo shoot was friggin’ awesome. Once I arrived, I felt so at ease. I felt so happy and excited. I’ve never felt so comfortable in front of a camera, before. Driving home, listening to Lemonade, I was riding so high. Talking to Beyonce like she’s in the car with me, “Girl, yes, best revenge is your paper! You better get that paper!” I texted my husband and invited him out to a bar for a drink just because I wasn’t ready to put this look to bed just yet.
In conclusion, things are incredible. And scary. And huge. And simple. And evolving. And I’m here for it–all of it.
XOXO, Lib
After living in our home for a little over a month, and walking around all of the boxes of art in the living room, we finally decided that enough is enough. It was time to hang the art on the walls.
It’s one of those things that really makes a house feel like a home but I wanted to make sure that we’d lived in this space for a while before we made any hole-in-the-wall decisions about where things would go. When we finally opened these boxes, it was like being greeted by long lost friends. The beauty of collecting art over time is that the longer they hang on your walls, the more memories they absorb.
I posted a photo on my Instagram and a few people asked me where we get all of our art. I’m really proud and excited to know so many cool artists and friends that I thought I’d just do a sweet, sweet roundup of all of our art and where it came from!
When I lived in my very first apartment after college, I thought I would be living all over the United States and I wanted to collect local art from every place I ever lived! Well… I have held that promise. But I haven’t lived that many places. Which is fine. When you fall in love with a place you just know it.
Top: Our friends, Ed and Ange gave us this little print of two robots falling in love. Okay, so I call it two robots but anyone who’s ever seen a refrigerator or a phone booth know that’s not what they are at all. But what can you do? Anyway–I love it so much and I thought it was a perfect combination with my little monster in our teeny tiny hallway.
Bottom: The little monster (he’s maybe 6″ wide) was given to me by my best friend, Jamie, when we were living together in Brookings, South Dakota. There’s a big art fair there every summer and while we were there, I fell in love with this monster series by artist Sarah Kargol. Jamie had this little piece commissioned to combine my love of the monsters with my love of American Literature. I hold him so dear.
Top right: This is a photo that Ryan took years and years ago. I actually had never seen it until I unpacked the boxes from our most recent move. I love it and I feel like it fits in really well in this space with our house illustration.
Bottom left: Our dear friends, Doug and Staci had this piece commissioned for us one year at Christmas time. It’s a picture of the house where Ryan and I fell in love–where we lived together for the first time and where we were when we got married. Opening that gift brought real tears to our eyes. Michelle Volansky is a great illustrator out of St. Louis that we’ve used to commission pieces for friends in the past, ourselves. (I also have a print of hers hanging in our bedroom, which will not be featured on this tour because of reasons.)
I grabbed this print from Brim Papery a few years ago shortly after she’d opened her Etsy shop. I love hanging this piece in my kitchen–it’s actually the first piece of art that people see when they walk into the house. I like to think it sets the tone for what kind of a household we’re running, here.
This poster of “plumes” easily gets the most comments of all of our art. Regrettably, I snagged it from the clearance section of Urban Outfitters several years ago. I wish there was more of a story to it but it is what it is.
The “eye heart ewe” card was a valentine that I gave to Ryan one year. He really liked it so I decided to pop it in this sweet frame that I got from Birchbox and I think they look awesome together.
My sister in law gave me that sweet little pitcher and we grabbed that big hunk of salt from a date to Strataca, the Underground Salt Museum in Hutchinson, KS. They told us that we were allowed to take a small piece of salt with us as a souvenir but they definitely didn’t want us to take a piece this huge. So while the tour guide wasn’t looking, I smuggled it in my sweatshirt.
Ryan promised that I could use this photo if I wanted to–this is a reminder to him in case he sees this and does not remember. 😉
We never intended to have a red-theme in our living room. I’m not even sure that either of us even like red that much but it all just works so well together. I didn’t curate this collection on purpose. It’s just stuff that I love and they all happen to go together so well!
1, 5. These are pages torn out of an old calendar about magicians that Ryan had. We loved them, so we decided to frame them and keep them.
2. My brother in law, Joshua Monaghan, is an incredible artist. He gave this girl to me for my birthday one year. He did most of the art in this collection. I’m really lucky that his art matches my taste perfectly.
3. This is an illustration of the guys in Ryan’s band, I Heard A Lion. I had this made up for them by an illustrator after the release of their last album. Unfortunately I can’t link you to the artist because her Etsy shop is closed and I don’t remember her name and I think she stopped posting on Instagram? I feel like a monster not being able to link you to the artist but I really tried.
4, 6. Other prints by Joshua Monaghan.
7. A darling little sign that I almost never obey. I picked it up at Hobby Lobby or some place like that.
8. I ordered this print for Ryan’s birthday one year from an Etsy shop called Ajbmtk. Ryan loves The Goonies and so I thought this was a really fun reference to hang on the wall. Also I just love the detail of this lady’s hair.
9. This is my favorite piece of art in our whole house. It’s a mash up of two of my favorite things, Joshua’s art and Ryan’s band. One day, Ryan was at Joshua’s apartment, screen printing IHAL t-shirts. They needed to test the screen on something and so they just grabbed this print that Joshua had lying around. Ryan brought it home for me and I framed it to hang prominently in my home. It makes me feel so happy and I love that it’s a one of a kind piece.
Where are your favorite places to find art? Do you have any good stories behind the art in your home?
There are a few other places where I really want to get art from like my friend Lynnette’s textile shop on Etsy. I’m also super duper in love with this subtle (and not so subtle) vagina art. I’m also saving up for an original piece by Frances Cannon because celebrating and supporting female artists.
And finally, since we’ve moved, I haven’t been able to do any painting but I’m excited to get started again next week! There will be art for sale in no time for you to hang in your own home! Make sure to follow on Instagram and Facebook to see when things go on sale!
XOXO, Lib ❤
You’re having feelings. So many feelings. Maybe even too many feelings. And if you’re anything like me, too many feelings feels an awful lot like none at all.
You might be doing that thing where you’re trying to rush the process. You might be fighting against the waves that are crashing all over you and that’s okay. That’s your impulse to stay alive. That’s okay but it’s important to know that you will get very tired very quickly. Can I make a suggestion? Just get the attention of someone else who is on shore. Sometimes just knowing that someone can see you drowning will revitalize something inside of you to focus, stop flailing, and do what you need to do to get to shore. That person might even have a life vest to throw out to you when you’re close enough to grab it.
And you just barely get up on shore and you flop down in the sand–on your back, spread eagle, vulnerable as all hell but breathing is the only priority right now. Your muscles are weak and your throat is burning but even by the time that you catch your breath, you’re in the process of getting up. Because your impulse is to live. Your body wants to keep itself alive despite the ache. Your spirit wants to keep itself alive. Despite the ache.
Yesterday my friend Sherilyn said, “It’s all part of being human to both resist and embrace it.”
Embrace it.
Let me tell you about the ache: It’s a sacred time. As long as you’re aching, you’re in a rare space and you’re going to want to pretend it’s not there. But lean into it. Learn from it. Rip yourself open in this achey time and gather all the knowledge and self-awareness that you can. Get your pay day. It’s part of it. I won’t walk through it without a payoff. None of this is for free. You can’t pay any kind of money for this sort of an education.
And I’m not going to hide my grief from you or anyone. I don’t–you don’t benefit from pretending that everything is fine. I’m not going to hunker down until I feel all better so that all you’ll see in this space is a well thought out, mature, healed woman. It’s for you. All of this is for you. I’m mining gold and I’m passing it out like candy and beads.
You have moved mountains, before, and you’re going to do it again so why not now?
XOXO, Lib
XOXO, Lib 